good evening everyone! besides my first blog i have not really revealed much about myself. besides being a mom, i have a full-time job leasing rental property.

even though i occasionally play the lottery in hopes of early retirement, i really love my job. one of the best parts of my job is that i get to meet a lot of people. most of the people i show property to are very nice and interesting people. while i am helping them find a new home i learn about them. quiet frequently you become friends with these people. you learn about their personal lives, you joke with them when they stop by the office to pay rent, you empathize with them when something bad happens to them; you get the picture.

Follow up:

every now and then you come across some people that really move you and make you think. for example, the other day i showed an apartment to a gentleman who spends his entire day as a care giver for an autistic adult.

i was sitting at my desk when this gentleman, who i will call "joe", walked into the office. i greeted him and he promptly let me know that he needed an apartment. so i started in with my routine "tour", which starts by finding out exactly what he needs and when he needs it. before i can show an apartment to anyone, i have to take their drivers license and keep it in the office for security reasons. so after securing his license we head for the golf cart. i discover when we go outside that his mom and another person are waiting for him.

his mom understands that i need her license as well but the other person did not have a license. it was, as explained to me, because he doesn't drive. he is the "client" of joe's. he was the autistic adult that joe takes care of everyday and he can't be left alone (which is why mom was along). once the client gets out of the car, i see why.

the client was about 45 years old and severely autistic. he rocked on his toes while trying to stand up and almost fell down. joe and his mom quickly grabbed him to help him steady himself. he had a blank stare on his face while he looked around at the sky and the trees. i asked joe if taking the golf cart would be okay (i didn't know if he had any sensory issues that would freak him out). it was decided to take the golf cart.

the client just followed in an aimless type of way over to the cart, they helped him in and then strapped the seat belt around him. the rest of us got in and i warned them that i was going to start backing up. as soon as i did, the client started making a high-pitched hollering sound. he didn't speak. joe and his mom assured him that everything was okay.

the client wiggled and hollered all the way to the model apartment. he seemed very happy when i came to a stop. i lead them inside and the client just sat down on the couch silently and waited very patiently. he didn't speak at all. he grunted one time and the mom told him that they would eat soon. anyway, the tour wrapped up and they eventually left.

people in the office stared at the client and wondered what was wrong with him. they were confused about this person. my co-workers questioned me after they left and i told him that he was autistic. and, they just had nothing really to say. they were not mean at all, but they know i have an autistic son. was i just seeing the future for my boy?

right now sir dantes is a cute, bright, energetic three year old. but what will happen as he gets older? is he destined to a life of being led around and not talking? is he destined to a life of falling over because he can not balance his weight on his toes? are we, as his parents, destined to having to hire a health care provider full-time because we have become to old to take care of him?

i have read and heard of very successful autism people: darryl hannah, temple grandin, einstein, and i have even read that bill gates is autistic. my husband has a very successful acquaintance from high school that is autistic. he has gotten his ph.d, written books, and traveled the world. could that be sir dantes' destiny? i would definitely prefer the successful destiny for him.

our therapist have warned us to not project our son's future. each child is different and with therapy, many of these children grow up to have careers, marry, and have children of their own. but there are those autistic children that regress and require constant care their entire lives. it is hard to not wonder what the future holds for sir dantes. and it is hard to not worry about it. some of his quirks are cute now, but they won't be cute if he's a teenager or an adult doing his happy dance.

i read an article not long ago that suggested, through studies, that the younger a child shows signs of autism the better they usually assimilate into society and lead "normal" lives. it also stated that children that show no signs and then "become" autistic at a later age, say four or five, usually regress into a severe state of autism.

this gives me some hope because sir dantes showed signs from almost birth. maybe it has something to do with catching it early and starting therapy early. i don't know. i just know that i want some normalcy for my child. i want to be comforted in the knowledge that he will have a happy and productive live. but, that comfort is not there. it may never be.

i guess i will just have to force myself to take it one day at a time and right now that means letting him be a child. and i need to prepare for the future, but also let myself have fun with him. after all, they say that children learn through play. so play on for now.